the dysphonia project

as this struggle of incarceration deepens my resolve, it will never weaken, for a lasting solution layes in: “ordo ab chao”, for; my soul has been full of sorrow, unhealed hurts. as i sit in a shadow of my thoughts of tomorrow. seeking an ear to listen, a compassionate voice to reassure, (or) the simplest touch & smile to reaffirm that i’m still human and loveable. as i go through this distant circumstance. within this cell with my thoughts as the devil’s dance within my head. wanting nothing more than to turn back the hands of time, “press stop!” then “rewind”, to a happier times of love, life, & contentment. while keeping a hold on the lessons learned from my confinement. but, having my cake & eating it too, is something i rarely do. longing for true friendship. a union together. two lives; two energies, – within one dynamic force. someone to grow with, learn from despite the chains & locks, the razor wire, thick doors and loud cries. a bond that’s been builted from the inside out. like hot living energy. “nitrous!” for the body & mind. i long to have my weariness erased by the hands of a “saving grace”. for, as the darkness is erased by the sunrise of human interactions i wish for my own sun to arise within the darkness of my confined existence. as i head toward freedom and prosperity, my confined existence i’ll never forget, but, order from chaos, i will have contained.